Local buses and micros in Nepal– can’t live with them, can’t live without them.
Every day, as I step out of the house, I’m already too tired just thinking about catching a local micro to college. I have to travel by local buses with creepy smiles from khalasi bro saying “Seat khali cha” at least twice a day, if not more.
Travelling in local buses in Nepal can be quite a hassle. And there are certain moments that make me facepalm myself. Don’t believe me? Read on to know all the awkward and annoying moments I face while travelling in a local Nepali vehicle!
1 Number of people that fit in a micro
Typically, a micro has no more than 15 seats. By that means, it should fit no more than 15 people, or maybe a few more if we compromise.
However, Nepali micro drivers and conductors believe otherwise. They believe that their micro can magically hold any number of people double or even triple the size referred by the safety standards.
So even when the micro is fully crowded and people are *literally* hanging from the door, they still scream out, "Eta aaunus, khali cha, atcha atcha!"
2 What people do in bus/micro
What would 20 something or even 30 strangers packed in a small micro do? What would the standing passengers in a crowded bus do?
A few of them plug in earphones and drift into their own worlds. Some of them mind their own business. Many people stare at other people as if it were a staring competition. And most of them stare into other people's phones. No sense of privacy, huh?
3 Why people start a conversation.
People in a crowded vehicle don't normally start a conversation with someone they don't know.
But when they do, it's usually the person next to you making a general conversation until one of you gets off. If not them, it's the people towering over you when you are seated.
One person asks, "Tapai kata jharnu huncha?" and everyone else stares at you like their life depends on your answer!
I always get pretty nervous when my answer is (and it usually is) "last stop ho" and they move on to ask someone else with a disappointed face. Way to go on making us feel guilty for sitting on the seat!
4 The time it takes to reach somewhere.
What would your answer be if I asked you what's the longest time taken by humankind to reach somewhere? You would probably say an astronaut in his spaceship going into space or beyond.
However, it takes the longest for humans to travel from Koteshwor to Kalanki in a local bus. Through Chabahil. No questions asked. *sigh*
5 Why there’s no bus/micro or taxi in sight .
Have you noticed that when you are in a hurry, everything messes up? I sure have.
When I am early, I easily get a micro that isn't crowded. There is no traffic jam on the way and I reach my college at 10 when it starts at 11.
BUT, when I am running late, there isn't a single micro or bus on the road! Not even a single taxi. This makes me wonder whether they are secretly spying on me and collectively decided to not go through my station because I complain about local buses all the time?
6 When khalasi bro says, "Seat khali cha."
Pro tip when looking for a local bus: Don't ever believe anything the khalasi bro says.
Especially when he says "Seat khali cha". It is almost never true. My personal experience of the number of times I was fooled by this statement gives me major trust issues. You know what my nightmares are about? It's a huge micro running after me saying "Seat khali cha".
At this point, I don't want to hear it even if it's true!
7 When you avoid a bus because it’s too crowded
Usually, when I see a very crowded Nepal Yatayat or a micro, my first thought is to avoid it and wait for the next one. My second thought is to get on it whatsoever because I can't risk being late to college all the time.
Anyway, I avoid it because nobody should get on a very crowded bus, right? However, the next vehicle that comes is even more crowded!
What sorcery is this? How is that even possible?
8 Why we should know basic maths
Apart from getting into a good college and paying your bills right at the grocery store, mathematics comes in real handy when you have to pay for 6 people with and without IDs in a local bus.
Some khalasi bros are cunning and would try to fool you by asking for more money than necessary. Apparently, they are really good at complex multiplications. Let no khalasi bro fool you into paying him more!
9 When you get a seat in micro
When you have to travel in a rather crowded bus standing more than half the way, all that you wish is for someone near you to get up and leave so you can finally relax your tiresome legs.
This mostly happens when you have barely 10 seconds to get off the bus. UGH! Nobody said life is fair, right?
Did we miss something that you face in your local commute on a daily basis? Let us know in the comment section below!
SHARE this with your friends so you all can facepalm together and plan the domination of local buses according to your will. *evil grin*