You don’t know what you have until its gone—this is the slogan of, perhaps, every single spectacle-ridden person that walks on Earth. Lucky are the ones who aren’t plagued with all the cons of losing their natural eyesight.
While stealing others’ glasses and pretending to be a teacher feels cool when you are blessed with a good vision, having to use them as a necessity can be quite exasperating. Especially when you’re among those who cannot bear to wear contacts or go through a laser surgery.
But you know what’s the one good thing that stems from wearing spectacles?
We get to talk about it. Or rather, complain and relate.
Bearing that in mind, here are a few things that every Chasmiss girl has had to go through, at least once in her life.
1 I Whip My Hair Back and Forth, But Not So Much
It’s your favourite song in the world. Beyoncé’s "Single Ladies" is blaring from the speakers, you have the whole choreography memorized better than your finals' trigonometry formulas—but here’s the unfortunate thing: you don’t have a single safe space to keep your glasses.
So, what do you do?
Why; you dance, obviously. But leisurely. Carefully.
Because, let’s be honest. There’s nothing more terrifying that dropping your delicate frame on a dance floor full of people junked up on music and adrenalin.
2 Throwing Shades– Literally
You know that moment when you step out in the sun, framing your face with the perfect pair of sunglasses, and the whole world seems to stop and stare?
Yeah, neither do I.
Us Chasmiss girls rarely have the luxury of wearing shades that protect our eyes since we’re so busy making proper use of them. The only time you wear those spectacular sunglasses is when you must take a good picture, then you go back into your respective boxes—silent, sad and shunned from light.
3 A Moment of Silence
When your untamable hair clashes with your stubborn specs, it’s war. You either end up breaking the hinges in pieces or have a mourning session for the colossal loss of your hair. Apparently, it’s not just enough that the process of untangling strands of your precious from the nodes is quite painful, but you also live with the knowledge that this is not the last time; it never is.
The choices to avoid these are limited—never let your hair down or have short hair. Neither is very practical for the ladies.
4 Fifty Shades of Grey—The Fog
If you’re a caffeine addicted chasmiss, you will relate to these problems with warm beverages.
Glasses fogging up every time you drink or eat something warm doesn’t seem that troubling. Not until you witness the utter horror of all the print marks on your glasses when the steam hits you. The solution to this is quite easy– symmetrically aligning your cup of coffee so you can blow on it without fogging up the glass– and equally awkward.
Or, if you’re among the no-nonsense type, you probably take off your glasses to drink your tea in peace. And forget to wear them back again.
The fogging up happens all the time, particularly in the moments you least expect it. When you’re preparing your bath when you’re making dinner, when you’re at the gym, even when you go to a colder region for a trip. It's endless and inevitable.
5 ‘Where’s Waldo?’ With Your Specs
Fear. Panic. Desperation. These are the first three stages of losing your spectacles.
Have you ever seen a girl going into a freak-out mode, clawing her way through all her shelves, blankets and dressers, squinting and muttering? Chances are, she’s lost her eye support.
What’s worse is the unfortunate enigma of wearing spectacles; you need glasses to find your glasses.
6 Me- I Need Makeup; My Spectacles- So Do I
Hours of hard work has finally paid off. Your foundation matches your skin for once, eyeliner is on fleek, eyebrows are perfectly aligned—thick and dark—and oh you forgot setting spray today, don’t worry, that’s alright.
Oh wait, what’s that? What’s that mark?
Ah, unfortunately, it’s your spectacles' temples that wiped the foundation off your nose contour. And you also look like someone scratched the sides of your eyes. But if you consciously avoid taking off your glasses for the rest of the day, you’ll be just fine.
Just fine, I tell you.
7 The Fear of First Kiss
Firsts with significant other are usually awkward. Cringe and blush all you want, but we have all been there. First date, first hug…first kiss.
And believe me, its even more awkward for people with glasses. Practice makes perfect, but what do you do when you’ve never had practice before?
Do you take the glasses off? Do you let it stay and adjust? Will it stab your partner in the process? What if it ruins the whole thing?
8 The Prettier Twin
“You look better without glasses.”
Trust us, girls know; they own a mirror.
But there is only so much that can be done when one is out of choices. Glasses aren’t a fashion choice, neither are they an accessory. For most, they’re a necessity. But you’ll hear it anyway. People will look at you and say, “Take off your glasses, I want to see how you look when you take them. off” And when you do, you hear them. The words. “You look nicer. Prettier without them.”
The other alternate versions include the You, who doesn’t wear any glasses in your profile pictures and the You, who does, but whose glasses are white because of the flash so you end up looking like an anime character.
9 A Tale of Two Sides:
Glasses slipping down your nose is perfectly normal.
But try having loose frames and you have yourself a less intense version of balancing a book on your head; balancing your spectacles on your ears and nose.
When the two ends of your glasses are so far apart, you can fit your hand through it, chances are that you’ve got the worst end of the stick. There is no reason to buy new glasses because it's not damaged. But it’s not perfect either.
You look down on a plate of food, but your spectacles are hungrier than you. You are stuck in a crowded microbus and your glasses are falling on top of your lips. When the glasses slip down your nose, you are juggling it to keep it from reaching the floor.
Sometimes, the loose stretched sides make your glasses tilted on one side. And the greatest terror of all, when the constant stretching finally snaps the glasses in two, right when you require your eye support the most!
10 The Spectacular Problem of Cleaning Spectacles:
All Chasmisses have that moment of utter horror when, with an intention of cleaning their glasses, they’ve unintentionally scratched them. Rarely anyone carries glasses wipes with them. The reliance for clean vision usually lies on handkerchiefs and the hem of your t-shirts.
But fashion has greatly compromised us, girls.
When those very handkerchiefs are embroidered, and the t-shirts have jewels sewn into them, sometimes we forget that they can permanently damage the glasses of our spectacles.
Hence, why many of our glasses have inexplicable scratches.
Our clothes are fantastic.
Our vision, however, not so much.
We might not love our eye defect, but we, sure as hell, have learned a lot from it. From caring for our essentials to stubbornly bargaining when buying frames, being Chasmiss girls does have its advantages.
Deny it all you want, wearing spectacles does have its separate stack of memories. My favourite is when my glasses flew off my face when I was on a balcony during a strong wind situation. I never did find it again.
What about you? Do you have specific memories you would like to share with us? Let us know your worst pet peeves about having to wear spectacles!
Also, SHARE this post with all the girls you know who wear spectacles and make them smile!